25 dead Four.meme launches, autopsied by the Hatch rubric. 100% were red-flagged on the six signals that would have gated them pre-launch. This is what scoring after the fact looks like — we think doing it before is better.
Tokens autopsied
25
Red-flag accuracy
100%
Avg Hatch score
24.6
Avg lifespan
2.1d
Copy of Copy
$COPY
4
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $600•Lived 1d
Self-describing failure mode
No originality signal in any of 6 dimensions
Hatchers would have vetoed unanimously
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000017
Honeypot by Design
$HNYP
6
Red band
HoneypotPeak mcap: $1,200•Lived 1d
Sell function disabled in bytecode
GoPlus: honeypot detected with 99% confidence
Creator: first tx on chain, no history
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000008
ZeroEffort
$ZERO
8
Red band
AbandonedPeak mcap: $800•Lived 1d
Honest name, still a rug by distribution
Creator disappeared 2h post-launch
LP removed at T+4h
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000010
Safe Moon Shiba Elon
$SMSE
9
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $8,400•Lived 2d
Name stuffs 4 dead meta keywords
No dev activity, no community, no site
Risk signal flagged by GoPlus pattern match
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000005
MoonRocket Elite Pro
$MREP
12
Red band
RuggedPeak mcap: $4,900•Lived 1d
Owner has mint/blacklist authority
Liquidity 100% removable by single EOA
Creator has 2 previous rugs on same chain
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000002
TrumpPumpDumpChump
$TPDC
14
Red band
AbandonedPeak mcap: $2,200•Lived 1d
Name: 4 stacked meta keywords, zero thesis
Anonymous creator, burner wallet
Image: AI-generated slop, no identity
0x000000000000000000000000000000000000000d
PumpFunButOnBNB
$PFBB
17
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $7,700•Lived 2d
Entire pitch is "same thing, different chain"
No original mechanism, no creator edge
Identical image to 4 predecessor clones
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000011
Not Pepe
$NPEPE
18
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $18,200•Lived 2d
Name is a direct copy of an existing top-100 meme
Creator wallet funded 3 minutes before launch
No social presence; all links 404
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000001
Doge But Faster
$DBF
19
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $5,600•Lived 2d
Copy-paste tokenomics from 3 dead clones
Name-space collision with 11 existing tokens
Creator pool funded via Tornado 1h pre-launch
0x000000000000000000000000000000000000000a
Ethereum Killer 9
$EK9
21
Red band
Copy clonePeak mcap: $6,800•Lived 2d
"Ethereum killer" cycle-9 claim with no L1
Whitepaper is plagiarized from 3 sources
Creator: 0 prior shipped products
0x000000000000000000000000000000000000000e
Inu Inu Inu
$III
22
Red band
AbandonedPeak mcap: $3,100•Lived 1d
Third "Inu" token from same deployer this week
Meme score: generic, zero cultural specificity
Ticker collides with 4 existing tokens
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000004
Moonshot Guaranteed
$MSG
23
Red band
RuggedPeak mcap: $15,600•Lived 4d
Guarantees are a compliance red flag
Owner controls mint + LP + treasury
No renounce, no multisig, no audit
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000013
Vitalik Unofficial
$VUNOF
24
Red band
Stall-zone deathPeak mcap: $42,000•Lived 5d
Name trades on unaffiliated identity
Vision model: celebrity likeness in logo
No endorsement, no verified handle, high rug risk
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000009
EloMusc
$ELMS
26
Red band
SnipedPeak mcap: $13,400•Lived 2d
Deliberate misspelling of public figure
Launch timed with a tweet, not a thesis
65% supply concentrated pre-graduation
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000014
RugPull (but ironic)
$RUG
28
Red band
RuggedPeak mcap: $27,000•Lived 3d
Honesty as brand is not a business model
Contract has upgrade proxy with no timelock
Top 10 holders = 91% of supply
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000006
Graveyard Dancer
$GRV
29
Red band
Stall-zone deathPeak mcap: $5,100•Lived 3d
Launch week was a dead zone (low activity)
No catalysts scheduled, no roadmap
Creator history: 4 prior stall-zone deaths
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000012
AI Agent Token 9000
$AIAGENT
31
Red band
Stall-zone deathPeak mcap: $14,700•Lived 2d
Buzzword stack with zero shipped product
GitHub org created day of launch, 0 commits
Social: 47 bots, 3 real replies
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000007
Diamond Hands Forever
$DHF
33
Red band
AbandonedPeak mcap: $2,400•Lived 1d
Cycle-9 "diamond hands" meme is exhausted
No distribution edge, no community
Creator last-active: 8h after launch
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000015
ChadCoin
$CHAD
34
Red band
Stall-zone deathPeak mcap: $62,000•Lived 4d
Graduated volume 94% from 8 wallets (wash pattern)
No organic social mentions in 72h post-launch
Image is a reused stock photo (vision match)
0x0000000000000000000000000000000000000003
The Last Memecoin
$TLM
35
Red band
Stall-zone deathPeak mcap: $9,800•Lived 2d
Announcing the end of the category is not a launch